What's Been On My Heart
Its officially been two months, three days, and a few hours since I left Germany to move to Florida.
I've been learning a lot through this move so far.
I learned that having your heart in two different places at once is actually possible. I can't even count how many times I've woken up wishing that I was still in my bedroom in Stuttgart. How many times I've thought about going to the chapel to have band rehearsals with my best friends. How many times I've thought about answering people in German, only to realize that they would think that I'm crazy. And how many times I've wished that I could go and play four square on Kelley with the coolest guys I've ever met.
I've also learned that just because you don't see God's plan, that doesn't mean that he doesn't have one.
Just being honest with you guys, I struggled a lot with this move. I really dreaded leaving.
Please don't get me wrong. I absolutely love Tampa, I love my friends here, and out of any other place I could have moved to this is definitely one of my first choices. But that doesn't mean that leaving is any easier.
I don't think I've cried as much as I did in the days leading up to us leaving, the day we said goodbye to our friends, and the day that I got on the plane. As soon as the wheels lifted off the runway I completely lost it.
At this point (if you've even read this far) you're probably thinking "Is this going to get better?" "Is their a happy ending?"
Yes, but its more of a TO BE CONTINUED.
While I was at camp God really talked to my heart. It was the last night of camp, the band was playing Reckless Love (a song that I heard A LOT in Germany) and I got really sad, confused, and angry. I didn't realize how many emotions and thoughts I had bottled up over the first few months of this year. Anger towards God, sadness from leaving my friends, and fear not knowing what life woulf be like being back in the states.
I found my thoughts saying, "God, why on earth would you bring me here? I had the best friends in the world, I had an amazing church, I loved where I was, and I was doing so much for you. Why did you bring me here?"
Then some how he took all of the uncertainty right off my shoulders and told me, "Savannah, I have so much planned for you in Florida that I haven't even shown you yet. I have so much that I'm going to do for you, and through you that you wont even believe it!"
It wasn't like I was hearing a person talking right to my face, but the words I was hearing were thoughts in my head that were so perfect and so peaceful that I know that they couldn't have come from me. It was just me and God.
So here is what I hope you to take away from this.
Sometimes life COMPLETELY stinks. There are going to be days when you are so sad and so confused that you don't think that God even notices you. I still have days like that. But I'm here to tell you, He sees you, He hears your every word, He sees every tear you've cried. And just because you're going through something insanely hard, that doesn't mean that he isn't there for you.
Because He has an AMAZING plan for you, and you might not see it yet, but just because it feels like he isn't there that doesn't mean that he isn't. He loves you so much, and he always wants whats best for you.
He sees the end result, the sees your future, he sees all the tears you're going to cry, and he's right there next to you the entire time.
So my story, and I'm sure of few of yours as well are still at a TO BE CONTINUED. You dont know whats next, and exactly what God has planned for you. Just know that in his perfect timing, and in his own way he'll show you!
Jeremiah 29:11
"For I know that plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Your friend, who's still figuring out the Florida life,
Savannah
I've been learning a lot through this move so far.
I learned that having your heart in two different places at once is actually possible. I can't even count how many times I've woken up wishing that I was still in my bedroom in Stuttgart. How many times I've thought about going to the chapel to have band rehearsals with my best friends. How many times I've thought about answering people in German, only to realize that they would think that I'm crazy. And how many times I've wished that I could go and play four square on Kelley with the coolest guys I've ever met.
I've also learned that just because you don't see God's plan, that doesn't mean that he doesn't have one.
Just being honest with you guys, I struggled a lot with this move. I really dreaded leaving.
Please don't get me wrong. I absolutely love Tampa, I love my friends here, and out of any other place I could have moved to this is definitely one of my first choices. But that doesn't mean that leaving is any easier.
I don't think I've cried as much as I did in the days leading up to us leaving, the day we said goodbye to our friends, and the day that I got on the plane. As soon as the wheels lifted off the runway I completely lost it.
At this point (if you've even read this far) you're probably thinking "Is this going to get better?" "Is their a happy ending?"
Yes, but its more of a TO BE CONTINUED.
While I was at camp God really talked to my heart. It was the last night of camp, the band was playing Reckless Love (a song that I heard A LOT in Germany) and I got really sad, confused, and angry. I didn't realize how many emotions and thoughts I had bottled up over the first few months of this year. Anger towards God, sadness from leaving my friends, and fear not knowing what life woulf be like being back in the states.
I found my thoughts saying, "God, why on earth would you bring me here? I had the best friends in the world, I had an amazing church, I loved where I was, and I was doing so much for you. Why did you bring me here?"
Then some how he took all of the uncertainty right off my shoulders and told me, "Savannah, I have so much planned for you in Florida that I haven't even shown you yet. I have so much that I'm going to do for you, and through you that you wont even believe it!"
It wasn't like I was hearing a person talking right to my face, but the words I was hearing were thoughts in my head that were so perfect and so peaceful that I know that they couldn't have come from me. It was just me and God.
So here is what I hope you to take away from this.
Sometimes life COMPLETELY stinks. There are going to be days when you are so sad and so confused that you don't think that God even notices you. I still have days like that. But I'm here to tell you, He sees you, He hears your every word, He sees every tear you've cried. And just because you're going through something insanely hard, that doesn't mean that he isn't there for you.
Because He has an AMAZING plan for you, and you might not see it yet, but just because it feels like he isn't there that doesn't mean that he isn't. He loves you so much, and he always wants whats best for you.
He sees the end result, the sees your future, he sees all the tears you're going to cry, and he's right there next to you the entire time.
So my story, and I'm sure of few of yours as well are still at a TO BE CONTINUED. You dont know whats next, and exactly what God has planned for you. Just know that in his perfect timing, and in his own way he'll show you!
Jeremiah 29:11
"For I know that plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Your friend, who's still figuring out the Florida life,
Savannah
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